blogger screwed up the template, and i am pissed, so i moved to wordpress.

This conflict that I have

the same place, with a different name.
the same song, only without you.
an expired time frame, way past our time.

But it's not you that my heart desires,
It's the one hidden like a treasure in the cove.

but why do we care about boys,
when all they do is break our hearts...

Left 4 Dead

it's interesting how everything turns into a massive L4D session. and also interesting how i dun bother jumping in the bandwagon.

well anyway, things take interesting turns, and sometimes i cope well, sometimes i dun. apparently life hasn't been kind, the latter seems to happen more often. i need to allocate more time to slp and less time to the internet. since 24 hours is not enough, i think i need to do 2 things at a time (like slp and msn)

and oh i need to gym too. i am growing fat, i swear. i need some form of time management, or a load of cash. i think the latter works better.

i think i grow sick of things too fast, unless it's those i never got (or will never get)

To be caught in between a dream

It's like, somehow, someone up there has conspired to make our day as miserable as it can possibly be. I mean, how do you wake up early to bright cheery sunlight just to find rain clouds over the pool? Or maybe, have your internship interview notice sent to you one day before the actual thing just to realise you have work too. Perhaps meanwhile, you could try explaining how you can spend one week studying for the wrong paper, only to realise it while sitting in the exam hall.

tell me how this life is not cruel, how to survive this never-ending torture?

Because the worst you can get is nothing at all

So many entries with angsty vibes, so many days of pent up frustrations, but i guess you never understood my distaste for your current lifestyle. Too jaded to appreciate, too tired to understand, yet you are too blind to see everything you have is everything i wanted when I was young, innocent and naive. Or when I didn't need to kill myself over commitments essential for basic (ok, perhaps slightly more than that) survival. The disparity (in almost everything) is killing me yet you do nothing to make it better, only worst. You only make me hate that more-glamourous-than-thou life even more.

In essence, one day, I think I'll be nonchalant to your inattentive-ness, your last minute changes, too-busy-for-thou attitude and action mainstream pop lifestyle.

Perhaps you'll be glad cause there'll be no more nagging, whining, screaming or unreasonable tantrums. Because all you'll get is an empty shell of me.

PS: and you know what, I'm glad you're there, not me.

Every night a different coloured light

When you know someone's character traits to a certain point, you either love them or hate them. And once it's fixed there, almost nothing much can change my opinion.

Yet for some people, I just detest them more after that point, and practically NOTHING can make my impression of them become better.I think when you know a person too well within too short a span of time, the everyday flaws can become overwhelming.

Trying too hard

You try so hard to make it right, try so hard to turn back time, try so hard to keep me by your side. But when night falls and you finally face yourself, you'ld realise you just don't love me anymore.

oh, and i'm hungry. very hungry. lack of dinner does that, i guess. chocolate cake sounds good except perhaps it's bedtime.

Time for a little lullaby

Time to say good night to my dearest, and good bye to the world. The world of freedom, vibrancy and sunlight. With the start of every new week I need to find strength to fulfill all duties assigned and commitments I've chosen. The lack of time and energy deprives me of the simplest joy of suntanning, coupled with my strike of bad luck with the weather. One fine day, mark my words, I WILL wake up on time on a sunny day for a tan =P